My recollections are mushy but they are meant to be. I don't remember what happened that day or that evening but I am still besotted with the memoirs of that night, that spine-chilling night when that fatso, grotesque DJ(one of the three of which Anil takes pride in comparing the Us & Os) managed to quench his insatiable thirst because of the blood,the sweat and the petrol we burnt.Ogre!
That was a starry night of October,2008, I reminisce.We,birds of the same flock,the shaukeen kind,Sumedh,Dhruv & myself found ourselves at the clean and hygienic interiors of 21/A,Tatya Tope,Wanowarie. The residence of Nirav,the theist jain,Sumit,the vagabond,Yogen,the Kauwa and Venky the Saint. So,it was their endeavor which kept the house cozy and tidy. Now,there were thousand rules for guests which were to be stringently followed to upkeep the serenity of the ambiance. How can guys that too bachelors and to add to it,engineers can live life this way?No fag, no booze, no dirt, no NVs of any kind, no this no that,no everything and all these bullshit lured us time and again to commit all those crimes that were banned in that vicinity. I guess girls and Engineers especially freshers share something in common here, they just exactly do what they are supposed not to.
Ok so we were sitting on the laps of the virgin room inviting us for destruction and completion just like a fully ornamented and decorated bride. There was no actual occupant of the room present because of arrangements and engagements. I had the key as I used to be a virtual roomie in that house for a handsome duration last year. We had our bellies full and were discussing all sorts of nonsense as we usually do, carving no fruitful substance but all shit and this shitting requires energy too. Throats sore, hunger peeps and many more lustful temptations that mushroom after the mid of night. So when the hour hand was hovering somewhere around the 2 AM mark, our dear friend DJ suddenly felt the urge of wetting his throat when he had sored it shouting and thrusting his out of the world ideas and philosophies,and what fluid did he demand my friends? of course, Beer! Beer at 2 AM in the city of Pune! Buddies as we are and deeply inspired by the motivational masala movies of Bollywood, DCH,RDB and so on, decided to fulfill our dear pal's need helping us for an adventure to be scribbled in the pages of our lives.
Sumedh kick-started his Red & Black Pulsar and warmed the engine with huge accelerations till the time I successfully managed to rest my grotesque bulk on the back-seat. Bike-rides generally give me a thrill and that night was no different. We just exchanged one last glance for affirmation and then set out for the memorable adventure. The engine roared and in a matter of seconds we were mapping the empty roads at 80kms an hour. The wind was chilling and in reaction all my body hair were straightened resembling the savannah grass. Sumedh is a damn Roadie and he is always geared up in the right attire no matter what hour of the day and I,like always, find solace in my pair of bermudas and half sleeve shirts. Hence I had to take shelter behind his huge back to retain body heat which was oozing out exponentially. However the shear thrill of the ride and the motto of it kept me exuberant and warm. We passed the Camp and reached the railway station area. Something inside Sumedh convinced him that he will be getting the damn elixir nearby the Sohrab Hall. There are a few bland restaurants nearby which open till late night and offer the requisites to men in mission like us but that night we were late than their late night time-tables. Failed once, failed twice but the monster inside was winning each time shouting and screeching, " C'mon guys, this is Pune and you are here to create history, Go on". A gentleman,yes he was gentle, overheard this I guess and then he uttered the golden word "Pyaasa". "Pyaasa will solve your problem kid,it's open all night, straight you go and take a left and right and then left and then..."."Ok,Ok..Thanx a million times chacha" told I and then set off again into the darkness just like a sailor in the midst of an ocean in a new moon night, a ray of distant light is the only hope.Is that a light-house? a star ? an illusion created of own ? I had forgotten all the directions mentioned by the generous chacha.
"should we go back to your chacha?you moron", shouted Bhim.We fondly call Sumedh cause we very much think,he will easily fit into that role. Whatever, we had been wandering for like 20 minutes in the emptiness of Pune and I don't know why I liked it except those Mercs,Audis and God knows what that sped past by reminding how fragile life is,courtesy : Amir baap k bigde aulaad. So,Sumedh was kind of exhausted and had turned frantic because of my forgetfulness. But I assured him of a treasure and convinced him to find it ourselves. We explored many streets and muhallas but I will mention the significant ones.We crossed the forbidden Sambhaji Bridge and smiled on our unfound crime. We crossed the streets of the famous,rather infamous Budhwaar Peth saving our virginity from those hungry hyenas poised to pounce without notice.Both these places are supposed to be swarming with Paandus,who stay hidden and surface immediately as soon as they smell innocence and lack of expertise, making an easy prey of their unsatisfying content of cash. However, to our great astonishment,we find none. Then we came across the majestic but haunted Shanivaar wada. That mistifying monument definitely gave me a chill given the things I had heard about it,that too in the darkest hours of the night,it was sure to make an impact.I suddenly felt colder.
That was a starry night of October,2008, I reminisce.We,birds of the same flock,the shaukeen kind,Sumedh,Dhruv & myself found ourselves at the clean and hygienic interiors of 21/A,Tatya Tope,Wanowarie. The residence of Nirav,the theist jain,Sumit,the vagabond,Yogen,the Kauwa and Venky the Saint. So,it was their endeavor which kept the house cozy and tidy. Now,there were thousand rules for guests which were to be stringently followed to upkeep the serenity of the ambiance. How can guys that too bachelors and to add to it,engineers can live life this way?No fag, no booze, no dirt, no NVs of any kind, no this no that,no everything and all these bullshit lured us time and again to commit all those crimes that were banned in that vicinity. I guess girls and Engineers especially freshers share something in common here, they just exactly do what they are supposed not to.
Ok so we were sitting on the laps of the virgin room inviting us for destruction and completion just like a fully ornamented and decorated bride. There was no actual occupant of the room present because of arrangements and engagements. I had the key as I used to be a virtual roomie in that house for a handsome duration last year. We had our bellies full and were discussing all sorts of nonsense as we usually do, carving no fruitful substance but all shit and this shitting requires energy too. Throats sore, hunger peeps and many more lustful temptations that mushroom after the mid of night. So when the hour hand was hovering somewhere around the 2 AM mark, our dear friend DJ suddenly felt the urge of wetting his throat when he had sored it shouting and thrusting his out of the world ideas and philosophies,and what fluid did he demand my friends? of course, Beer! Beer at 2 AM in the city of Pune! Buddies as we are and deeply inspired by the motivational masala movies of Bollywood, DCH,RDB and so on, decided to fulfill our dear pal's need helping us for an adventure to be scribbled in the pages of our lives.
Sumedh kick-started his Red & Black Pulsar and warmed the engine with huge accelerations till the time I successfully managed to rest my grotesque bulk on the back-seat. Bike-rides generally give me a thrill and that night was no different. We just exchanged one last glance for affirmation and then set out for the memorable adventure. The engine roared and in a matter of seconds we were mapping the empty roads at 80kms an hour. The wind was chilling and in reaction all my body hair were straightened resembling the savannah grass. Sumedh is a damn Roadie and he is always geared up in the right attire no matter what hour of the day and I,like always, find solace in my pair of bermudas and half sleeve shirts. Hence I had to take shelter behind his huge back to retain body heat which was oozing out exponentially. However the shear thrill of the ride and the motto of it kept me exuberant and warm. We passed the Camp and reached the railway station area. Something inside Sumedh convinced him that he will be getting the damn elixir nearby the Sohrab Hall. There are a few bland restaurants nearby which open till late night and offer the requisites to men in mission like us but that night we were late than their late night time-tables. Failed once, failed twice but the monster inside was winning each time shouting and screeching, " C'mon guys, this is Pune and you are here to create history, Go on". A gentleman,yes he was gentle, overheard this I guess and then he uttered the golden word "Pyaasa". "Pyaasa will solve your problem kid,it's open all night, straight you go and take a left and right and then left and then..."."Ok,Ok..Thanx a million times chacha" told I and then set off again into the darkness just like a sailor in the midst of an ocean in a new moon night, a ray of distant light is the only hope.Is that a light-house? a star ? an illusion created of own ? I had forgotten all the directions mentioned by the generous chacha.
"should we go back to your chacha?you moron", shouted Bhim.We fondly call Sumedh cause we very much think,he will easily fit into that role. Whatever, we had been wandering for like 20 minutes in the emptiness of Pune and I don't know why I liked it except those Mercs,Audis and God knows what that sped past by reminding how fragile life is,courtesy : Amir baap k bigde aulaad. So,Sumedh was kind of exhausted and had turned frantic because of my forgetfulness. But I assured him of a treasure and convinced him to find it ourselves. We explored many streets and muhallas but I will mention the significant ones.We crossed the forbidden Sambhaji Bridge and smiled on our unfound crime. We crossed the streets of the famous,rather infamous Budhwaar Peth saving our virginity from those hungry hyenas poised to pounce without notice.Both these places are supposed to be swarming with Paandus,who stay hidden and surface immediately as soon as they smell innocence and lack of expertise, making an easy prey of their unsatisfying content of cash. However, to our great astonishment,we find none. Then we came across the majestic but haunted Shanivaar wada. That mistifying monument definitely gave me a chill given the things I had heard about it,that too in the darkest hours of the night,it was sure to make an impact.I suddenly felt colder.
While we were celebrating our luck and escape,there it was,at a distant,to our horror, a guy getting a good dressing from two paandus. The scene definitely gave us a chill but it was weak enough to send us back. So we raced ahead. The moment when we were crossing that spot,we understood that an over drunk chap has become the victim.That rang a bell.Treasure is not that far dear, we are on the right part of the island. As we moved further, we found another man lying unconscious on the road with puke strewn all around.More good news. As we moved ahead, we saw lots of Paandus sprawling.I quietly hissed,"This is it,man.This is it.We have entered the Chakravyuh,now no looking back".We reached a cross-road when we saw some faint reddish smoke of light oozing out of a bill-board on the distant left.So we took the turn in hope and optimism. I was ecstatic with the feeling that the journey was finally going to end. Fool I was. A few meters into the road, and the raspy sound of the engines had invited the attention of the street dogs all around. Skinny and obnoxious they were unlike the fatty and lazy breed found in the remaining parts of the city. If you have watched Resident Evil : The Apocalypse,The Day After Tomorrow or I am Legend, you can visualize what I witnessed that day.Anyways, the worst part is,those slimy creatures started running behind the bike giving me a run for my life.My bare legs must have looked like large Chicken Tangdis to those beasts. The abominable barks and razor sharp canines still give me a chill.Instantly without my own knowledge,my legs were floating in the air just adjacent to Bhim's ears. When he noticed those pole shapes appearing out of nowhere on either side of his,very confusigly and irritably he asked ,"What are these?",ashamed to say what they were,I just said,"Tu bas gaadi bhaga,full speed".I brought the legs down only after I made it sure that the dogs had lost the chase.
In a few seconds,we were finally there and we could see Pyaasa written in Hindi in Red LEDs. I was no more feeling cold now. In fact I had sweated profusely some seconds back. Anyways,the place was crowded with bikes on either side supervised by a man clad in white who was ordering the customers to park their vehicles in the exact place,he pointed. There was little light in the area and it was very difficult to see,approximately 20 meters on either side,but the rest of the street was flooded with light.It seem as if it was purposefully done.So,we parked the bike and then approached the man.We managed to figure some other people beside hissing and murmuring. The corridor behind the man clad in white was creepy,odious and dark. As soon as we approached him he pushed us into that hallway leaving us aghast. We halted momentarily and then stepped twice.At the end of the hallway,another guy became visible waving as if calling in a hurry. Without a thought,we started walking towards him and also noticed that every step we took increased the quantity of light around us.
The other end of the hallway led us into a different world altogether which convinced us that Pune is indeed the sister-city of Mumbai which never sleeps. The entire setup very much resembled an old fashioned house with open spaces in the middle and rooms on the periphery.The area was bright with light and warmth. It was quaint as well as lively because the hall on the right was flooding with people of all ages who sat across the length and breadth of the flourishing bar blissfully shouting and enjoying as if they are attending a lavish marriage party in broad day-light.The entire site just left me bewildered with amazement. I turned my eyes to see more of the hidden paradise and it's secrets.Suddenly my eyes caught a pair of red eyes,directly aimed at me with constant vigilance, embedded in the monstrous head of a giant black wild rhinoceros.No wait,it's a man.I felt a sudden pain in my stomach and was sure that this man must have killed humans just by his fiery looks whose death might have been later declared as cardiac failure.He had the amount of gold in the form of ornaments across his tanker belly that will even give Bappi Lahiri an envy and would have been enough to help me marry off the daughters of my family for seven generations.I quickly turned my eyes away from the zombie and then saw a peculiar sight.A series of small wooden doors lined up on the right wall of the room. It took me a few moments to understand the secret behind them but as soon as my mind struck, I started to feel suffocating and nauseating. I was just praying,"God please please make me invisible,I have had enough".At this juncture, Bhim called out to me,"Hey,this is a happening place and we have already been through a traumatic journey.So let's chill around and have a a bottle of beer here itself." I reacted in nanoseconds,"Are you fucking crazy out of your mind,you Necrophilia or whatever you are fond of calling yourself?,I can't stand any longer"."You are such a Phattu.Can't you see students around,must be four or five years younger to you.If they can sit merrily,why can't you?",shrieked Bhim."Ya ya but I can also notice the criminals and the wanteds too.No arguments for god's shake.Let me make the deal and we are outta here". I went to the man behind the counter and asked if he had beer to which he replied in a very husky voice,"we have tonnes of it.Just tell me what and how much you want.Don't waste my time".I felt very puny at that moment but somehow gathered the courage to ask,"three fosters large".The transaction was over in a matter of seconds with me ending up paying almost double the price.However I wasn't at all wary of that instead my entire focus was on our return,untouched and unharmed.
When we came out of that abode,Bhim suggested me to tuck the bottles inside my shirt to which I obliged because of the fear of the pack of the paandus strolling all around.Bhim kicked his bike again and I remember well,there was no stopping,no conversation anywhere till we landed safely on the solid grounds of Tatya Tope.The single ab below my diaphragm had become a frozen turkey.
DJ welcomed us in his usual style when we steeped in."Kahan mar gaye the kaminon?" and it was time to narrate him the entire story that we indeed have returned from the jaws of death and shame.We did tell him everything with extra spices by Bhim leaving no opportunity to prove how phattu I was,the entire time.We sipped the nectar and caught our breath lying on the mats spread on the adjacent terrace.It was finally over.An adventure worth remembering.
When 750 ml of beer had managed to position itself in the labyrinth of his enormous stomach,in the wee hours of the morning,DJ purred in a cunning but assured tone,"Ab chai peene chalein?" I failed to react.Lack of energy,cash,sleep,courage and slangs just allowed me to utter a quiet "BOSE D K".Then I went inside and started producing ear-shattering snores seconds later.
P.S.
----
Sorry Moms but your sons have grown.
The other end of the hallway led us into a different world altogether which convinced us that Pune is indeed the sister-city of Mumbai which never sleeps. The entire setup very much resembled an old fashioned house with open spaces in the middle and rooms on the periphery.The area was bright with light and warmth. It was quaint as well as lively because the hall on the right was flooding with people of all ages who sat across the length and breadth of the flourishing bar blissfully shouting and enjoying as if they are attending a lavish marriage party in broad day-light.The entire site just left me bewildered with amazement. I turned my eyes to see more of the hidden paradise and it's secrets.Suddenly my eyes caught a pair of red eyes,directly aimed at me with constant vigilance, embedded in the monstrous head of a giant black wild rhinoceros.No wait,it's a man.I felt a sudden pain in my stomach and was sure that this man must have killed humans just by his fiery looks whose death might have been later declared as cardiac failure.He had the amount of gold in the form of ornaments across his tanker belly that will even give Bappi Lahiri an envy and would have been enough to help me marry off the daughters of my family for seven generations.I quickly turned my eyes away from the zombie and then saw a peculiar sight.A series of small wooden doors lined up on the right wall of the room. It took me a few moments to understand the secret behind them but as soon as my mind struck, I started to feel suffocating and nauseating. I was just praying,"God please please make me invisible,I have had enough".At this juncture, Bhim called out to me,"Hey,this is a happening place and we have already been through a traumatic journey.So let's chill around and have a a bottle of beer here itself." I reacted in nanoseconds,"Are you fucking crazy out of your mind,you Necrophilia or whatever you are fond of calling yourself?,I can't stand any longer"."You are such a Phattu.Can't you see students around,must be four or five years younger to you.If they can sit merrily,why can't you?",shrieked Bhim."Ya ya but I can also notice the criminals and the wanteds too.No arguments for god's shake.Let me make the deal and we are outta here". I went to the man behind the counter and asked if he had beer to which he replied in a very husky voice,"we have tonnes of it.Just tell me what and how much you want.Don't waste my time".I felt very puny at that moment but somehow gathered the courage to ask,"three fosters large".The transaction was over in a matter of seconds with me ending up paying almost double the price.However I wasn't at all wary of that instead my entire focus was on our return,untouched and unharmed.
When we came out of that abode,Bhim suggested me to tuck the bottles inside my shirt to which I obliged because of the fear of the pack of the paandus strolling all around.Bhim kicked his bike again and I remember well,there was no stopping,no conversation anywhere till we landed safely on the solid grounds of Tatya Tope.The single ab below my diaphragm had become a frozen turkey.
DJ welcomed us in his usual style when we steeped in."Kahan mar gaye the kaminon?" and it was time to narrate him the entire story that we indeed have returned from the jaws of death and shame.We did tell him everything with extra spices by Bhim leaving no opportunity to prove how phattu I was,the entire time.We sipped the nectar and caught our breath lying on the mats spread on the adjacent terrace.It was finally over.An adventure worth remembering.
When 750 ml of beer had managed to position itself in the labyrinth of his enormous stomach,in the wee hours of the morning,DJ purred in a cunning but assured tone,"Ab chai peene chalein?" I failed to react.Lack of energy,cash,sleep,courage and slangs just allowed me to utter a quiet "BOSE D K".Then I went inside and started producing ear-shattering snores seconds later.
P.S.
----
Sorry Moms but your sons have grown.
